


Follow Through

by FadingIntoYou



Category: Code Black (TV)
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-11-02
Updated: 2015-12-09
Packaged: 2018-04-29 14:50:29
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 6,301
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5131622
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/FadingIntoYou/pseuds/FadingIntoYou
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Leanne Rorish is known for being a bit of a cowboy, and Neal Hudson studied under her while making a name for himself. They've been working together for years, and this is what it could look like if they stopped looking out for the next disaster and started looking at what was right in front of them.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> If you're caught up with the show, there shouldn't be any spoilers. I was hesitant to post this because we know so little about the characters, but I still feel like that gives a bit more creative freedom to me so...here we are.

It wasn’t that Leanne didn’t know how to process her emotions, but more that she was feeling lost in a different aspect of her life for the second time in so many years. Her life as a doctor was one she was certain of; one she knew was earned with the blood, sweat, and tears that came with holding a person’s life in your hands. It was a ruthless profession, one that wasn’t for the weak or faint of heart, and that’s exactly what she kept reminding herself every time she saw families fall apart in her ER. She knew that feeling, the overwhelming urge to just break down because the life you knew was slipping away without any chance of changing the outcome. She knew the fear, she knew the anger, but what she was feeling now wasn’t either of those things. She felt lost, that much she knew, but it was more like she was losing something she never had. She was mourning the idea she had in her head, and she was kicking herself for even entertaining her hopes for a moment. They knew better than anyone that regrets could only harm them over time, but she was human, despite what people seemed to think. She felt more than most would assume, and she was self-aware enough to know it was written all over her face sometimes. That was exactly why she was, for lack of a better word, hiding outside the ER, gripping her coffee tightly as she stood staring into the dark. It was that dense darkness that signaled sunrise was near, but holding out until the very last moment. It comforted her, almost like the sun was just as afraid as she was, both knowing they had jobs they had to do; it was just a matter of time. She took a sip of her coffee, grimacing at the taste and temperature as she tossed it into the trash can to her left, folding her arms over her chest as she leaned against the wall. She closed her eyes and took a deep breath, willing her walls to go back up because she couldn’t take it if her emotions didn’t get under control before she had to head back in. She didn’t need this confusion any day, but today she was especially tired of it running circles in her head.

“Are you okay?” she heard beside her, and she tensed involuntarily as she took a small step to her left, putting distance between her and that voice as she slowly opened her eyes. She didn’t look at him, didn’t want to, so she continued to stare into the dark. It was becoming less dark now, and she knew her and the sun’s time were almost up; they were needed, and they didn’t really get a say in the matter.

“Of course. I’ll see you inside,” Leanne murmured, going to step around Neal as he leaned right beside her against the wall. She was just about to pass him when she felt his fingers close gently around her right wrist, and she looked back into the light, preferring to watch the sun than to see whatever it was he was trying to tell her with his eyes. It was their thing, but she just didn’t want him to pry this time.

“Neal-“

“Leanne, talk to me,” he uttered softly, his accent thicker than usual and she had to sigh. They were exhausted, 14 hours into a shift from hell where they’d already lost 4 patients, and he always sounded like this when something was bothering him. They had a much needed break in patients, but everyone knew it wouldn’t last. They just had to take solace when they could.

“I’m fine. Are you okay?” she asked, and mentally berated the way her voice lowered, turning soft against her will as they made eye contact. He was looking down at her, his eyes red rimmed as his lips lifted to smile slightly at her, and she could see the question in his gaze. He knew her, too well at times, and he was reading her despite the numerous times she told him not to. His grip on her wrist tightened for a second, and she knew she should pull away but she couldn’t bring herself to do it. He needed her; she wasn’t about to push him away when she knew that to some degree, she needed him too.

“You’ve been avoiding me Leanne-“

“I’ve talked to you all shift Neal, you know that’s not true” she interrupted, and dropped her gaze when he tugged her wrist into his side, bringing her hip to rest against his upper thigh despite her better judgment. He slid his fingers from her wrist down to her palm, gently intertwining their fingers so she couldn’t pull away from him as he rested their hands against his thigh. He didn’t do that often, but when he did she gave in because she was weak; he made her weak and she let him.

“Talk to me,” he repeated, and she just rested the side of her head against his shoulder briefly as she spoke.

“I can’t,” she said, and she slowly untangled their fingers as she pulled away from him, and she could feel his frustration as she let his hand go, the warmth disappearing as sunlight bled into the sky, casting different colors over everything they could see. It was beautiful, and she knew their time was up. She wasn’t sure if she was grateful or frustrated, and seeing the way his shoulders fell, she knew this was just the beginning. She saw Christa come through the door with two cups of coffee in her hand, and Leanne knew exactly who she was looking for.

“Looks like you have company,” Leanne muttered to him as she stepped away, and the wounded look he shot her was enough to almost make her apologize if they didn’t have an audience.

“Can we talk later?” he asked as Christa neared, and Leanne knew this wasn’t the end of…whatever it was that was happening. She knew better, she knew him better.

“You know where to find me,” she responded, nodding to Christa as she passed, thankful to see Jesse waiting just inside the doors for her.

 


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Leanne Rorish is known for being a bit of a cowboy, and Neal Hudson studied under her while making a name for himself. They've been working together for years, and this is what it could look like if they stopped looking out for the next disaster and started looking at what was right in front of them.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you're caught up with the show, there shouldn't be any spoilers. I was hesitant to post this because we know so little about the characters, but I still feel like that gives a bit more creative freedom to me so...here we are.

She was was watching them from the other side of the ER, and she couldn’t help but be drawn to them like a moth to a flame. It wasn’t the first time she’d watched them work, but there was something in the way that they were moving around each other that demanded her attention. Malaya may be the only one of the residents that is most familiar with Rorish and Hudson, but she also wasn’t blind. She saw the way Christa had taken a liking to Dr. Hudson, and saw the way Hudson was polite, but not necessarily returning her attention. It actually seemed as though lately, he was spending quite a bit of time with Dr. Rorish. She wasn’t usually one to speculate about her colleagues, but it just so happens the two doctors she is dying to learn from are basically attached at the hip.

She’d heard the rumors, knew that a lot of the staff enjoyed their bouts of gossip, especially if it included either one of them. Most of the time, there were allusions, but never flat out statements that claimed Hudson and Rorish were together. She never thought much of it, that is until Jesse had told her yesterday to find Dr. Rorish for some paperwork, telling her that it wasn’t life or death, he just wanted to get started on it when she had the chance. She went around trying to locate her, and as a last ditch effort, decided to try outside the hospital in case she needed food or something. Just as she was about to head out the doors, she saw Dr. Hudson and Dr. Rorish, and she almost tripped trying to avoid going through the doors. She could see how close they were standing, and when Dr. Rorish leaned into him, she was overcome with embarrassment. She knew this wasn’t something she was supposed to be privy to, and she felt creepy that she couldn’t pull herself away. She thought about just biting the bullet, but she sensed someone behind her and immediately dropped her gaze when she realized it was Jesse.

“I was just-“

“Just watching them like a stalker? It’s okay, you’re not the first,” he said, eyes on them as Malaya looked over at him. She saw Christa coming towards them, and smiled forcefully as she greeted her, pulling Jesse’s attention away from the attendings.

“Needing the extra caffeine tonight Christa?” Jesse asks, taking a few steps away from the doors as Christa just raised the cups a bit higher.

“Just trying to be nice, I’ll see you guys in 15” Jesse and Malaya watched her make her way towards the doors, and Malaya couldn’t help but say something.

“Shouldn’t we at least tell her-“

“Tell her what? You didn’t see anything Dr. Pineda, but I’m sure there are other things you could be doing,” Jesse said, and he motioned towards the nurse’s station. She smiled and nodded, realizing as she walked away that this wasn’t something that she had any business interfering in. She didn’t know exactly what she saw, and she had no desire to have that conversation with either one of them. It would end horribly for her, she just knew it.

Jesse looked over his shoulder, making sure Malaya was nowhere near them as Leanne came inside, arching her eyebrow questioningly at him as he stopped her. She cocked her head to the side, curious but willing when he opened his arms to her for a hug, and she relaxed when she felt his arms hug her tightly.

“It’s none of my business, but make sure whatever it is life throws your way, you hold onto the good with two hands” he whispered in her ear, and he could feel the way she tensed as he pulled away. He nodded at her with a smile, rubbing her arms as she looked blankly back at him, lost for words.

“I know everything…except your account of this case so come on Daddy, Momma needs some help,” he said, and Leanne had to smile; Jesse always knew exactly what to say when she didn’t want anything said at all.

 

 


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Leanne Rorish is known for being a bit of a cowboy, and Neal Hudson studied under her while making a name for himself. They've been working together for years, and this is what it could look like if they stopped looking out for the next disaster and started looking at what was right in front of them.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you're caught up with the show, there shouldn't be any spoilers. I was hesitant to post this because we know so little about the characters, but I still feel like that gives a bit more creative freedom to me so...here we are.

“How’s she doing?” Leanne asked, coming up behind him as he watched his parents a few feet away. He was drained, but his mother was recovering and his father was glued to her bedside. He watched the way his father tenderly stroked his mother’s cheek, and he could feel his eyes water as he watched the absolute adoration in each of their eyes. He knew Leanne was asking about more than just his mother, and despite everything, he was glad she was always there to ground him. She taught him a lot of what he knows, but she’s become more of a confidant than his mentor considering how long they’d been together.

“She’s getting better every hour, and my father is hovering like always,” he replied, and he could feel the hand she gingerly placed on his back as he let out a shaky breath. He’d felt like at any moment he’d fall apart up until now, but here he was knowing she wasn’t going to let that happen. He looked over at her and he could see the glassiness of her eyes, knowing she was thinking about her own family. He remembered her telling him how she envied his chance to save the ones he loved, and he felt for her. He now understood a fraction of her pain and panic, and it was just another thing that was going to make their bond stronger. Come hell or high water, they were always going to do right by their patients, but it wasn’t ever going to cost them their relationship. He looked down at her and she nodded, patting his back as she started to move away from him again.

“Is now a bad time?” he asked, and she shot a look over at his parents before raising an eyebrow at him. He looked over as well and crossed his arms over his chest, knowing what she was asking. They may have had a…moment a couple days ago, but he didn’t forget about wanting to talk to her.

“Dad is going to be glued to her side, and we’ve been off for 20 minutes. Mom will understand if I just need a minute to decompress, and I’m sure she wants to reassure my father she’s fine,” he replied, motioning his head toward the lounge. They both knew there was a chance one or both of them was going to be called in early, but Leanne nodded anyway, following him into the room and shutting the door.

She leaned against the wood of the door as he sat on the edge of the table, rubbing his eyes with the palms of his hands trying to keep her from seeing the tears that were starting to fall after everything he’d been through. She knew this tested everything he was as a doctor and as a son tonight, and her heart broke at the way his shoulders rose and fell with every uneven breath. She looked around, realizing the blinds were drawn closed for once, and didn’t resist the urge to comfort him when she realized she needed some reassurance too. She cautiously put an arm around the back of his neck, and he leaned into her as he wrapped his arms around her back. His head rested against hers, his stubble against her cheek as they leaned into one another. Her other hand came up to wrap around the other side of his neck, and they both just held onto one another for dear life. She could feel her tears threatening to fall when he stuttered out a breath against her ear, exhaling a quiet thank you as he started to calm down. His grip on her didn’t loosen, and she wasn’t embarrassed about just how tight she held him back. This was what he needed, and she considered that maybe it was her he needed too.

“Better?” she asked, and he just held onto her tighter, nodding his head. His stubble scraped against her cheek and she shivered, her nails digging into his shoulder briefly before she pulled back. He smirked at her and she rolled her eyes, shaking her head as they let each other go. She moved away from him to slide onto the table beside him, their thighs touching as they stared at the door. Her shoulder bumped his and he leaned into her, looking at her while she looked ahead.

“You know Christa is nothing more than a colleague right?” he asked, his voice soft in case he spooked her. She just closed her eyes, wishing they weren’t going to have this conversation right now. It was dangerous, putting words to feelings when they were feeling so emotionally raw, but here they were. They were unconventional to say the least, and he was going to push the issue. Typical.

“She’s a resident, and there’s nothing else to talk about,” Leanne said nodding, hoping he’d drop the subject. He was flirting with their line, trying to force an issue that was going to do more harm than good if they weren’t careful.

“She’s just a resident. There’s nothing-“ he spoke and stopped, afraid that Leanne was going to bolt if he kept talking. But there she was, looking at the floor now as her hand formed a fist on her thigh, her knuckles white as she let him talk. He moved his right hand to rest over her left, running his thumb over her knuckles as he continued.

“I trust you Leanne. When I need you, you’re always there, and you’ve never let me down. Today was no exception, and I just want you to know how much that means to me,” he admitted, and she blew out a low laugh, shaking her head without looking up.

“Despite all of the bickering we do, I know you’re always behind me when I need you to be. It’s just something I’ve come to expect; you always being on my side when it counts. It’s what makes me brave when sometimes I’m anything but. How could I not do everything I could when you needed it? I had to do whatever I could in case you didn't get to walk out of there” Leanne admitted, her words growing quiet with the knowledge that he meant more to her than she originally thought.

She released her fist to flip her hand palm up, waiting for him to intertwine their fingers before she spoke again. She hated how much she’s come to depend on him, but Neal was a good man and he deserved her to at least meet him half way. He couldn’t keep putting himself out there and be okay when she hides behind her walls. It wasn’t fair, and he at least earned the right to have her try. Neal looked down at their intertwined hands and smiled, squeezing Leanne’s hand to make her look up at him as he tipped his head to the side.

“So, does this mean I can hug you whenever the mood strikes?” he asked cheekily, and laughed aloud when she used her right hand to lightly hit him in the shoulder. He reached up quickly to trap her hand against him, pulling her closer to him in the process which surprised her. Her quick intake of breath was a boost to his ego, if only because she was letting him close enough to see who she was when she wasn’t trying to keep people out. She tilted her head to the side, a sly smile crossing her face as he just stared, momentarily at a loss for words.

“You can try, but I’d advise against it Dr. Hudson,” she said, her slight threat understood, but softened by the squeeze she gave his hand as she pulled away from him.

“You never know, maybe I like living life on the edge Dr. Rorish” he said to her back, watching as she made her way to the door. She turned the handle but looked back at him, the door staying closed as she looked him in the eye.

“Don’t die out on that ledge Neal, I might even miss you,” she said, her voice sincere yet teasing, and he couldn’t help the laugh he let out as she slipped through the door. Hearing the soft click after her, Neal just sat on the table for a moment contemplating the last 24 hours, and he realized one thing; he really needed a day off. Preferably to see Leanne outside of work, but he’d take what he could get.

 

 


	4. Chapter 4

Neal had been waiting for almost ten minutes, and he tired with the way his night was circling around in his head. When Jesse had come to get him for Leanne, he’ll admit that he panicked. Jesse wouldn’t tell him why, and he honestly thought something was wrong with her until he finally laid eyes on her. The way she angled her body away from him as she spoke said volumes, and the minor tremble of her hand tugged at his heartstrings. Leanne was a warrior in his eyes, always had been, but seeing her doubt her judgment hurt him in a way he wasn’t familiar with. It was him a few weeks ago doubting himself, and she was right there, telling him there was no one better to treat his mother, and here he was, being told to make a choice because she knew her judgment was compromised. He knew about her family, knew what having that choice put on her was doing, and he couldn’t help throwing himself into the middle of chaos to ease her doubts. He knew that between the cop and the suspect, only one would have a chance, and he chose to do whatever he could to try to save them both. She trusted him to do what was right, and he was going to do right by her no matter what.

Guthrie Jr. questioned his chosen path of ER medicine when he had tried to save the suspect with surgical maneuvers, and the conversation left a sour taste in his mouth. It was just like with his father, he was being questioned about his life’s work by people that never bothered to ask instead, what made him love ER medicine. The answer, at least part of it, was simple; Leanne. Not in a romantic sense, that came much later, but just her passion for those few precious moments people have when they as doctors become their last chance. It was a rush when he first started, and it didn’t ever diminish over time. He was still just as grateful when he got to tell a family member that their loved one had made it, and was just as upset when he had to tell another that their loved one hadn’t. He’d made the choice to stay here, work with Leanne, and have a real chance to be the kind of doctor he knew he could be. He knew he wanted to be his best, and that’s exactly what he strived every day to achieve. He was brooding when he saw Leanne come in the ER, saw her search for him before making eye contact with him and he smiled when she held up a finger, getting sucked into another conversation with a nurse this time. He turned to walk towards the doors when he walked right into Christa, and apologized when he saw who it was he almost ran over.

“Sorry Christa, I guess I was just a bit preoccupied,” he said, nodding his head as he glanced over at Leanne, who was engrossed in her conversation. He smirked, looking back at Christa as she stuck her hands into her pockets.

“It’s okay, don’t worry about it. I was actually wondering if your raincheck was still good…” she asked hopefully, and behind them Jesse just raised his eyebrows as he looked down, then looked to his left to Malaya who just looked torn. He tapped her shoe with his and gave her a look, and she nodded, going back to her task that didn’t include staring at the doctors in front of them. If he subtly kept watching them, it just happened.

“I’m sorry, I actually have something I need to do, maybe another time?” he asked, moving away from her as Leanne got closer. He didn’t wait for her answer, and fell into step with Leanne as she walked out, Leanne throwing a look at Jesse as she passed, getting a grin and a wave in return. As they walked out, Christa leaned against the desk, looking to Jesse and Malaya, who had decided to stop pretending to work in favor of throwing a sly look at Jesse.

“Did I miss something?” Christa asked, and Malaya just shrugged, picking up charts and moving away from the awkward question. She really didn’t know anything, but she wasn’t going to stick her foot in her mouth either. Jesse just gave Christa a smile, patting her shoulder as he passed.

“Don’t worry, I’m sure Dr. Hudson just had to ask Dr. Rorish something,” he said, and left Christa standing there, feeling as if she wasn’t getting the whole truth.

 

* * *

 

Walking out side by side, Neal bumped Leanne’s shoulder, getting a questioning glance in return as she checked her phone. He knew she was planning to go home, but he was still feeling a bit off kilter with what had happened today, and he honestly just wanted to spend some time with her.

“Chinese and scotch at my place?” he asked quietly, shoving both hands into the front pockets of his jeans as she looked up at him. She could see how tired he was, but she was inclined to say yes, just because she didn’t think she could handle being alone after everything.

“Neal it’s late-“ she protested, but he cut her off before she could say anything else.

“Leanne, you haven’t eaten all day…just let me be there for you this once…” he trailed off, giving her a look that was soft and warm and completely tackled her defenses. She hated when he did that. She nodded, going towards her car as he stayed put, watching her open her door and stop.

“Do I need to pick up anything on my way over?” she asked, and he rocked back on his heels, mooting towards his car with his head as he started walking.

“You’re exhausted, and it’ll be faster if we just drive together. I’ll even let you buy dinner next time,” he said over her minor protest, knowing she would offer to drive or pay for the food because she always did. She rolled her eyes at him, shutting her door and locking her car as she made her way over to him. He gave her a cheeky smile as he opened the driver side door, and she shot a glare at him over the hood of the car.

"You're such a pain in the ass…” she muttered, and he laughed aloud, knowing she hated when he told her what to do.

 

* * *

 

As they made their way out of the elevator and towards his front door, Leanne was first to catch the delivery man with cash he hadn’t seen her pull out in the car. She threw him a triumphant look as he held his hand out for her bag, taking it from her as he let himself into his apartment. He should have seen that coming really, she was never one to agree to things so easily. He dropped both of their bags onto the table inside his entryway, hanging his jacked on the hook as he slipped off his shoes. He made his way into the kitchen, grabbing the bottle of scotch from the cabinet above his refrigerator and setting it down before finding them glasses. He knew after a day like today scotch was necessary, so he brought both the bottle and the glasses to his living room table, filling them as she walked in the door.

“Now who’s a pain in the ass…” he muttered, secretly enjoying they way she laughed at him as she deposited the bag of food onto the table.

“It’s still you,” she responded immediately, patting his shoulder as she moved away to take off her shoes. She knew he had a ritual, and had been over enough times to know that he bag was beside his, and soon both her jacket and shoes would do the same. She walked back to him, massaging her neck as she sat on the couch beside him. He was just placing the remote down, a show she’d never seen playing lowly in the background.

She tucked a leg under her as he passed her chow mien wordlessly, chop sticks stuck in the take out container as he held his scotch to his chest, leaning back into the couch and closing his eyes. She took a bite of her food, appreciating that he remembered her favorite as she quietly studied him, his eyelashes resting against his cheek bones as he took slow breaths. He looked worn out, and she remembered the eager talented resident he once was, trying to prove himself to the world that he could make it as a doctor. She knew from the first day he was going to be one of the good ones, but never did she think he was going to become, in essence, her partner. They’ve been together for years, and he’s taken it in stride, all of the changes she was forced to make because life had other plans for her. He was still there, still fighting for her when she really needed him. She was startled out of her musing when he took a drink, eyes still closed as he spoke.

“You really should eat some more,” he murmured, and she was glad that he wasn’t looking at her to see just how soft her face was when looking at him. She took another bite as he opened his eyes, reaching for what she knew was broccoli beef as he leaned back into the couch, angling his body towards her as they ate with random commercials breaking their comfortable silence.

 


	5. Chapter 5

Two scotches and a split fried rice later, Leanne was burrowed into her corner of the couch, one leg still underneath her as the other rested on the coffee table, head lying on the back off the couch. Neal had slouched further into the cushions, his head resting on Leanne’s thigh as both feet sat on the coffee table about a foot past hers. She was drifting in and out of consciousness, Neal’s twitching leaving her in that hazy feeling between sleep and waking up. When she felt him twitch again, she turned her body into the couch more, reaching her right hand down to run over his hair hoping it would calm him a bit.

_There were only a handful of patients in the ER, nowhere near a code black, but Neal was anxious as he worked on his car crash victim. Leanne was supposed to start an hour ago, and while he knew she wasn’t normally late, there was always a first time. It kept him on edge, and thinned his already small amount of patience as he once again had to push his patient back onto the exam table._

_“Will you stay still? You have a concussion and multiple broken bones and lacerations. We need to-“_

_“Just tell me if Nicole is going to be okay!”_

_The seventeen year old wailed, and Neal’s heart went out to his stubborn patient. Keith had been driving himself and his girlfriend Nicole on the highway during one of LA’s rare downpours, going off the road and into a tree when he tried to avoid an animal on the road. They smacked into the tree on the passenger side, and his girlfriend had been rushed into surgery when they arrived. Neal didn’t know anything more than that, and there wasn’t any way he was going to leave Keith to find out. His patient came first._

_“Keith, if you can stay still and let us examine you, I’ll have Dr. Lorenson go see if there’s an update on Nicole alright?” the boy still looked frantic around the eyes, but nodded at him, relaxing a bit as the residents came to assist. He looked over at Christa who nodded back and disappeared to do exactly as he’d promised. When Malaya came up right next to him, he was about to give her instructions when she just looked at him briefly, eyes wide and frightened._

_“Jesse said he needs to see you, now,” she said, her voice shaken but trying to focus on taking over for him. He looked at her confused as he pulled back, tearing off his gown to follow Jesse, who didn’t even look at him as they made their way down the hall. Jesse had a hand over his mouth as he walked, and finally Neal jogged around him to face Jesse, seeing the nurse red eyed and distraught._

_“Jesse, what’s wrong?” Neal asked, and he could feel dread set in as Jesse wiped at his eyes, clearing his throat to finally look at him. Neal leaned against the wall behind him, worried as Jesse finally spoke._

_“The storm is causing more patients to come our way in a little while but….There was an accident on 101 where a driver weaved in out of traffic, sending another car into the concrete divider. She-The driver didn’t make it,” Jesse said, voice hitching with his last sentence. Neal could feel all of the air leave his lungs as Jesse leans forward, putting both hands on his shoulders when he feels like he’s about to collapse._

_"Please don't say-" Neal can’t even get the rest of his sentence out, desperately hoping he was dreaming._

_“Leanne died on impact,” Jesse whispered, and Neal felt the tears behind his eyes as he rapidly blinked, his vision becoming blurry. He’d just seen her, she was just at his apartment- ___

__“Leanne!”_ _

__Neal jolted himself out of his nightmare, jumping away from Leanne as she dropped her hand, shifting over to hazily stare down at him. Neal was heaving out breaths, and it took her a second before she recognized the look in his eyes._ _

__“I’m familiar with that panicked sound,” she murmured, trying to wake up further as she watched him mimic her position, but leaving only a foot between their heads on the back of the couch._ _

__“What happened,” she asked sympathetically, and Neal couldn’t stop the words from coming out. It was all too real for him, knowing now what it was like to almost lose someone and not being able to do a thing to stop it. It was suffocating._ _

__“I was working, and Jesse came in telling me that I lost someone,” he whispered, not able to shake off the dream just yet. It hit close to home for him, feeling the way he does about her and knowing anything could happen at any given time. Neal tilted his head in close to Leanne, hoping she’d take the hint, and he exhaled a shaky breath when she rested her forehead against his. The skin to skin contact helped ground him, helped him realize she really wasn’t gone._ _

__Leanne watched the way his eyes kept flickering over her face and she tried to smile, remembering what it was like to have dreams like that; what kind of special hell it was to wake up and realize it wasn’t just a dream. She knew it all too well, and Leanne had been left alone to suffer. She still suffered, but she couldn’t sit back and watch Neal relive his dream over and over._ _

__“Was it your mother-“_ _

__“No,” he replied, dropping his eyes from her face to pick at the cushion beneath him._ _

__“Was it-“_ _

__“It was you,” he said quietly, his voice pained she could tell. His accent thickened and she could feel the tears gather behind her eyes. She’d never dreamt of losing him before, at least not until his mother’s case. Having the plastic separate them was excruciating, knowing she could only do so much to help him and his family. He’d become more important than he already was to her, and it scared her just as much as it comforted her. He knew both versions of her, and still chose to be with her. They may have been vague with titles, but she knew he’d rather chop off his hand than hurt her. It was what made him so easy to trust._ _

__Leanne didn’t know how to comfort him most times, but when she did, she went with her gut instinct. This time around, she did the same because being alone and afraid wasn’t something she wanted him to experience when she was right beside him. Leanne reached her right hand up behind his neck, tilting his head down as he moved willingly, allowing her to press her lips against the skin of his forehead. The pressure was light but reassuring, a point of contact for them both._ _

__“I’m right here,” she whispered, her lips brushing his skin with every word. She closed her eyes, feeling him breathe out against her collarbone until he pulled his head back up to gaze at her. Neal just looked at her, and Leanne decided not all impulse decisions were bad ones. She leaned into him, watching his eyes widen when she pressed her lips to the corner of his mouth, pulling back just enough to see his reaction._ _

__“Thank God,” he exhaled, and this time Leanne kissed him again, but properly this time. He was already smiling, and it it made her smile, forcing them to break apart when neither of them could kiss one another because of their grins. They both burst out laughing, and it was nice to see the naked fear leave Neal’s eyes for a much happier expression._ _

__“Is that going to happen every time I kiss you?” she asked teasingly, and Neal’s expression became serious as he brought both hands up to cradle her face before kissing her, this time with heat. He brushed his lips against hers with purpose, taking her bottom lip between his, nipping it with his teeth. He heard the low hum she let out as he swiped his tongue gently over where his teeth had been, her head tilting slightly to give him a better angle. When he pulled back from Leanne, he kept his hands on her face, watching the way her eyes slowly opened, her pupils dilated. It made his breathing speed up, knowing he could illicit that kind of response from her._ _

__“I guess you’ll just have to keep doing it to find out,” he replied huskily to her question, and this time she pulled him in, smirking when her teeth on his lip caused him to moan low in his throat. When they broke apart for air, Leanne tilted her head away from Neal, and he took that as an invitation to kiss a path from her jaw to her ear. She wouldn’t admit that his stubble against her skin was a turn on, but she had a feeling that when she shivered, he knew exactly what he’d done._ _


End file.
